Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Iran's Nukes Won't Be Ready Until 2011

There is growing evidence that Iran's nuclear program could be more than just a green energy program. What was once considered by any thoughtful person to be a jobs-creating, environmentally friendly, progressive initiative has apparently turned into something slightly more inventive.

Iran may be developing nuclear weapons.

But, while proof mounts that they do have enough uranium to create the warheads, and they've been flaunting their launch capabilities - which stretch well into Europe and beyond - the good news is the program will not be completed until 2011.

That means we have at least another year of peace and happiness. And who but the most ardent tea-bagging scaremonger doesn't like the idea of a year of peace and happiness?

The bottom line is 2010 is going to be a wonderful year, where Iran does not have functioning nuclear weapons. So as long as it's still 2010, any threats they make toward other countries like Israel will be limp and lifeless. And any obliterations these weapons may incur will not happen until at least January.

That's next January.

So what are you worried about? A year is a long time. A lot can happen in a year. Are you trying to tell me a year isn't a long time or that a lot can't happen in a year?

Let's say Iran decides to eliminate Israel from the planet. It's not going to happen until at least 2011. It's not 2011 now, is it? Am I mistaken? Is my calendar wrong? Have I been asleep for a year? Did the ball in Times Square the other night have the wrong number flashing on it repeatedly with glitter and no one noticed? Maybe there was glitter in my eye and the 1 looked like a 0? Oh that's right, I wasn't even in Times Square.

So it's definitely 2010, right? Right. That's what I thought. It's not 2011 yet. So shut up.

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